Learning How To Accept

Learning How To Accept

Recently a friend of mine asked me this question " I can´t help but think of the bad things about myself, I think of the failures I have accomplished and the days that were so bad I tried to kill myself. Those days where I lost my job, when I was misused , the day she left and so many things that just doesn´t make sense to me. Why it happened and how ? How do I find peace with my thoughts ?"

We all are  suffering from this term called overthinking, stuck in the past and other´s call it by scientific names to complicate things. I am sure, you have many friends as well suffering from these kind of things, who sometimes ask you for your help and you can´t give them much tips because you don´t know their Situation. For me what I like to do is simply stop trying to forget about the past, bad memories and trying to move on but I learn to accept it as a part of my life. One thing that most people forget is that they are human, you are allowed to make mistakes, fail, fall and maybe even made fun of in high school periods .

We are born to fail more than we are born to succeed. Trust me, if you see people in the social media enjoying their success and they seem to keep posting joyful things on their day or status. Somehow looking at those post you feel like you are good for nothing compare to them, It´s normal, we all have been there and felt those. Our human brain is built to compare and see the negative side of everything , that is why controlling it is very hard.

Only few succeed at that, when they do,  some call it enlightenment and for others they have different names for it. But forget about the names for now, you only feel that you are not good enough because you only see their success, not their failure and now days with social media you can sometimes never see their failures and falls. You are screened to only their success their good parts , never their negative ones. That´s why I tell people " We live in a world of lies, where somehow everyone is lying in someways or another". So to deal with your insecurities, your overthinking, grief. You must know that we all are human and as humans are all  born to fail in someways or another, if not in one task, they will fail in the other one. We must accept that we are human and that they being human too, those people you see smiling have made to many countless mistakes, have fallen down a lot and has been embarrassed in someways in their life. One must learn to accept these memories and never try to forget them.

Of course sometimes people can be a ´meanie beanie´ and try to remind you always of those failures but this is where the modern Meme comes in handy. Of course I am not telling you to turn yourself into a meme but simply just try to find the humour in those memories and mistakes you did as a human. Share what you were thinking and just laugh, make everyone laugh with your mistakes.

You see in school syllabus and education system, you don´t learn how to deal with failure, life and how to look forward. That´s why I think people do really bad sometimes in interviews, exams and dealing with life. I am just here to tell you that no matter how much you fail, you are not a loser as people and yourself define you as. I quote from one of my favorite moviesof all time called `Little Miss Sunshine` by Valerie Faris and Jonathan Dayton.

"Losers are people who are so afraid of not winning, they never even try and you are trying now aren´t you ? Even if you tried and failed that´s good enough".